Saturday, December 4, 2010

freedom

I have been cranky and irritable and impatient these last few weeks. Sure, I blame it on my baby hormones. But maybe, just maybe, could it be an attitude issue?

Attitude is something I talk a lot about with my four year old. 'You need to change your attitude.' And it's true, at least once a day, on a normal day, he does. But God has been nudging me and today He made me fall over. When I started off this day by being grumpy with my son for asking me when I would get up to get his breakfast I knew I really needed an attitude change!

Friday morning I had the opportunity to go for some much needed 'time out' and spend an hour or so away on my own to reflect on just WHY I have been so cranky lately. Some things are habits that need to be changed - like getting up earlier again to have some quiet time in the mornings which means going to bed earlier, too. But ultimately, I think, in most situations it comes down to self - control and choice. Choosing humor, for example.

That afternoon, during Ayden's naptime, I took Dylan and Elliot to the pool. Dylan had a blast paddling around in the whirlpool. Seeing his puppylike, wildly splashing 'swimming', the dopey grin on his face and hearing Elliot's squeals of laughter - need I say more?

A few months ago, a visiting speaker shared at our international fellowship and the one thing he said that has stuck with me since is 'Choose joy'. So much in life is our choice - how we respond to difficulties, what we do with our emotions, how we deal with frustrations...

It does go against my nature to choose joy in the midst of a one year olds screaming, a three year old who stubbornly refuses to get dressed or a four year old who, literally, is in your face at 6am saying 'Get up'. Or choosing joy in the midst of life's trials, pain, sickness, hardships, and challenges. Or the boss who keeps getting on your case. Or the friend, co - worker, family member we struggle to get along with. But, oh, what a difference it makes and what freedom it brings.

Choosing joy gives me the patience to deal with the screaming, stubborn, in your face child and gives me hope in spite of all the challenges I might be facing. Choosing joy helps me to count my blessings and to look to Jesus, who is still there and involved, 'an ever-present help in times of trouble'. Choosing joy changes me, alters my attitude and, almost magically, influences the attitude of those around me.

It frees me up to enjoy and live in each moment and takes my mind of worrying.

And on a side note: Baby is kicking away these days - one more reason to choose joy!